Long Time Past

This is a the complete story. At least as far as I have.

In a faraway place, long time ago long time before your papa lived, long time before his papa lived, long, long time before his papa lived. There was a man, Bill was his name, who five foot tall, what a shame. This was strange. Most of the people were six-foot to eight foot. He lived in a place you most likely have not heard of, Banana Teaser. Banana Teaser is in the Arctic Ocean on a small island.  The man, which invented the wheel was one of the least smart of all the Bananazers. Bananazer maybe a new word to you but it is what the Banana Teasers were called. It was a surprise to them at who invented it, I will tell you how in a minute. He had a wife and eight sons and eight daughters you must remember this for it is very important to the story, but you also must remember all the children liked to box, as all good Bananazers do. I will not bore you with all the name but will tell you the youngest two, Jezebel and Ahab. You might think it would be cold at Banana Teaser but was actually rather warm but it would snow a lot but it would melt right away, such a shame that all the snow went to a wast.  One time when it was appallingly cold it snowed so much they had to make a new word, Blizzard.

With all the snow there was not much to do. The Grand Mayer of the Banana Teasers declared a MASSIVE boxing match with all the Bananazers in it even old Mr. Grimbald. I will tell you about the wheel in a minute. The best boxer “Batering Bam” was in the area so they had him pared with every one at once. Since he was a giant of a man ten foot ten he thought he had an easy job. Hastily, the Grand Mayer had everyone come and bring the their gloves for themself. The ring was one hundred feet by one hundred feet. It happened that BB had fourty-nine people to fight.

BB had been to a faraway place were it was colder and he had brought back a pair of snowshoes and so he decided to try them out on the way to the boxing match, because the snow was very fluffy. When he got the snowshoes he did not take the time to learn how to use them and they did not come with an owners manual and he could not read. So he put them on and walked around in his room for a while and after an hour or so he finally walked out to show of his snowshoes. I will tell you about the wheel in a minute. He had a horrible time getting through all the people on the way out so he stated that he would not go till they were out of sight  on the way to the ring. Then he left. but on the way…

There he had to pass a house, in the house live our Bill with his children and wife. He and his family had already left for the ring, all the family that is except the youngest two Jezebel and Ahab. The names are not common for a reason which you will see. I will tell you about the wheel in a minute. Just as BB was going by on his snowshoes the children had an idea, thinking of the snow cave they had made earlier which BB would go over. They snuck out of the house and after BB. As he was walking along he was whistling a tune, The Day I Died. He was having a little bit of trouble walking in the snow with his snowshoes and stumbling every now and then. They followed him for a little bit then they snuck up on him and gave him a…

Push. Now about how that wheel was invented. The man had been sick and had weakened some so he made something like a barbell he took a rod and stuck two wood stumps on the end after putting a hole though each, and since they were a little big he got a peg and stuck one on each side of each stump to keep it from sliding around too much. After using them for a while he set them down and went and got a friend to show him his barbells. His friend used them for a little then they both left leaving them on the ground. Both of them went of and forgot about them. The man went of and his children asked him to build them a club house on the hill in a tree. He should have gone and asked some one else to help him, but he stated to himself ”I am so strong from my new machine that I do not need help”. He was taking the floor board up the hill when he tripped and fell on something, it was his barbells. The board landed on the two barbells with the man on  top…

At the ring all the people had gathered around in a group wondering where BB was and why he was not here yet. They did not send anyone out to search for him because he would be angry and they really wanted to beat him and it would be harder with an angry man. They talk about how they were going to beat him. They talked about how the wheel had been invented. Intrepidly, they talked about battle plans. If BB had heard theses plans he would be horrified. One was that the four best would come on from all quarters and when one would be getting hit the others would give him a hit. This was one of the lesser plans. It started to snow and after a while the ring needed clearing, but by then they did not think that it really needed clearing because they thought BB had turned chicken and ran. After waiting five hours they got mad and went out to get him and put him in jail. Remember that it had snowed. After being out in the snow for a long time they were REALLY mad at BB, for not showing up, and they were all cold and it was his fault.

Back to BB, Ahab and Jezebel. When they gave him a push, he fell forward into the snow, but he fell though the snow headfirst into the children’s cavern. The key was he did not fall all the way through. His snowshoes made him stay hanging two feet from the ground. Looking around him he saw some bananas, two chairs and a table, which he had thankfully had not come down on as the children had planned. When he looked up it was snowing and what little light came through was slowly dissipating. On the table there was a banana, and since they were so far north the banana was almost a ring. He looked the other way and there he saw an apple and a knife. Reaching over he tried to reach the knife, but just missed the handle. Unsuccessfully, he tried to pull himself up to untie his snowshoes, but failed. After failing at trying to free himself he tried getting the banana, and succeeded. Amazingly he got an idea, which was unusual for a man was few cards short of a deck to put it nicely. He picked up the table and set it under him and the he pushed up on it with all his might and the table broke. Picking up one of the table legs, BB tried to hit the snow to try to get himself free. It was slow work and he could only hit a little at a time before he had to rest, and he was getting an extraordinary headache. The light was almost out.

Back to the wheel. After the board fell on the barbells he landed on the board, this made it go slowly forward to the slope and he was paralyzed with fear. It rolled to the edge of the hill, which should be called a mountain, his feet were hanging over the edge of the board and keeping the board on the barbells. As he went down he slowly gained speed. Up ahead of him was a bridge. This bridge was an arch bridge and half way up he left the ground and some how he landed with the barbell in under him and still gaining speed. At the bottom of the hill was a man, who was shadow boxing. The man loved punching HARD and at that moment was punching REALLY hard. The man on the barbells was heading straight for him. Neither of them saw each other.

The mob was heading in and was not in a good mood. Bill invited them all in for some hot cocoa and some cookies. His wife made the best cookies in the whole island and he made the best cocoa in the whole island. Bill and his wife buttered up all the men and woman, but then two of the children got in a fight and it reminded them all about BB. Bill asked his wife were Ahab and Jezebel were, and she did not know. He asked everyone and no one knew. So he had everyone go and look for them out in the snow, which only made them angrier. They did not find them at the ring and had no idea were to look. One of the men stumbled in to a cave in the snow and onto a chair.

And the man ran right into the other man just as he was punching as hard as he could. It was also the day that the pancake was invented, because he went from seven-foot three to three-foot seven in a remarkably short time. He had horrible head aches after that, which can well be understood. The other man sold the wheel and the rights to make it to the other man for a handsome profit but then went and squandered it all. The boxer gave up his career bought the wheel and rights to sell it and became a wheel sales man.  And found BB and then every one got mad at him again and he had tons of explaining to do which he quickly told without much prompting. He then stated that he would fix it all by telling a story from the future, which he said would come true. Back then there was a silly story going around that a dragon had visited one of the other islands in a nother area. BB’s story was about “Dragons vs. Machine Guns”. 

And the man ran right into the other man just as he was punching as hard as he could. It was also the day that the pancake was invented, because he went from seven-foot three to three-foot seven in a remarkably short time. He had horrible head aches after that, which can well be understood. The other man sold the wheel and the rights to make it to the other man for a handsome profit but then went and squandered it all. The boxer gave up his career bought the wheel and rights to sell it and became a wheel sales man.  And found BB and then every one got mad at him again and he had tons of explaining to do which he quickly told without much prompting. He then stated that he would fix it all by telling a story from the future, which he said would come true. Back then there was a silly story going around that a dragon had visited one of the other islands in a nother area. BB’s story was about “Dragons vs. Machine Guns”. 

              Beverly & Pack 

VS.  

  Based on a photo by DVIDSHUB 

BB story went like this. Many many year from now in a place on the other side of the board. It was called the board since they all believed that the earth was flat, we all know that the earth is round now but then they did not.  In a town a there was a  man named Billy Blankendrought (blanken drought, and Billy not Bill or anything other than billy) he was a crack shot with  a machine gun and loved to go lion hunting with his wife who was not quite as good of shot but almost. They had three children, Hunter,  Sally and Gunner. After a while all the lions were killed in that country, which is Nowadays  northern Canada. It was a very cold winter that year and they had not prepared as much as they should have.  They had warm house with heating but it was not working properly and stayed at forty F° almost all the time. Because of this, they would do is they would all get together and bring all the furs and blankets and stay warm that way. Some of the neighbors asked to barrow some firs and they kindly let them barrow some.

          By woodleywonderworks  

After the winter, which was longer and colder than usual Billy thought that every one could use a little stretching out from being cramped up in the house. Then going about and collecting the all the firs they had let there friends barrow. A few weeks later a man came though the town, big as life and bigger. All that anyone knew about him was that his name was Mulligan and that he was a dragon hunter. He went about in his big green Humvee with his driver. No one had seen it but everyone said that he had a huge machine gun that popped out of the top of the Humvee. All over him there were scars and when he first came he did not have any hair on his head then, one week after he had eyebrows, hair and a beard. The driver was a mean cross looking man with one ear cut of.  They both carried pistols.  The Humvee had tinted windows so that you could not see in from the outside at all, even the windshields on the front and on the back were tinted pitch black. When he got out of it the door he opened and the glass was at least half a foot thick. Around his neck was a necklace and on it there was four big teeth. One man got a glimpse of the inside and saw a seal

                    By Pinkmoose

The seal was not an animal. Although the man only got a quick look at it he was almost one hundred percent sure that it was the president’s seal. The driver was walking with the man and a snake appeared and he just pulled out his pistol and shot it. It was no small gun.  He then picked up the snake, which was five foot long and flung it fifteen feet. He left then came back then a different man came running into town and up to the mayor, he was scared out of his pants, the man that is not the mayor. Excitedly he started swinging his tongue to him and all the mayor got out of him was “dragon”  he was a well-known man in that place and not one for telling lies or getting scared easily. His name was George. They finally got him calmed down then they asked him to tell them the story again.

The story went like this, I was going to visit my mother’s aunt’s nieces sons uncle who lived four hours drive with no stops away from here. While I was there I was on the go most of the time so after a week of this I was tired and there was a time change to. I almost fell asleep driving, but then I got pulled over by the cops, and then half an hour from home some smoke started rising from the over side of a mountain at first it looked like someone was burning trash then it became darker I though I was seeing things till it doubled in size and some fire trucks went tearing by with lights flashing and sirens wailing it was not something I was just seeing. Then on the other side of the road a tank came along chewing up the road with it tracks. Leaving that place in a hurry, to much of a hurry I was to find out, I speed way over the speed limit then along came a cop, and another ticket this was a bad day, slowing down I looked back and I saw a dragon…

             Photo By Chimothy27

Thinking it was a prank of some sort or since I was so tired maybe I was seeing things after  stopping the car I looked back for a better look and it started moving taking a picture of it and then looking at it in the small screen, it was a digital camera when the dragon was there I knew it was real. I was driving my off roader, it is not really made to go on the road but it will go over one hundred and fifty, going top speed rounding a bend all my tires went about the task of grinding rubber, in other words FLAT. Only two miles from here I started running faster than I had ever run in all my long life. The cross-country team was practising beside the road one mile from here they were almost done their run and I was still passing them, with one runner left to pass we were one two hundred yards from the end of THEIR run and I passed him and he did not pass me back. I could hear them yelling to me but did not slow down coming in to town I was going at a dead run and gaining speed. All of this was from fright. Going straight to here and up the stairs.     

          Shot by david.nikonvscanon 

Then one of the men that was listening to the story let out with an ear-piercing yell, we are all trap. All of the people looked up to find that they were really trapped in. Everyone had been so engrossed in the story that none of them had given any attention to the children and they had covered up all the entrance with some tree branches and then since it was snowing it had covered up the branches so that they were trapped in. After trying to push their way out they gave it up after the torches that they had been carring,  burned up trying to make a fire or a light some how they stumbled into the table and broke it up for wood. Still needing way to light the wood they felt around some more, BB let out a yell and which brought everyone to him then they all crashed into one another and knocked BB down…

BB after some yapping said that he had stepped on a rock and a piece of metal all the others got real excited and started hunting for it while banging heads and other body parts together. One of them found the rock and another found the metal and then another grabbed a blanket he had brought along and started tearing it up. With the flint and steel and blanket they made a fire and tossed some of the table on it and then BB went on with his story but before he could get one word out besides “next” a man asked how are we going to get out? If we melt our way out we will get soaked and then could all catch a bug and if the branches catch on fire they will fall on us and we will get burned. This proved to be quite the problem until BB said… 

               Took by Silenceofnight